Dialogue on Death and Dying: A successful, well-attended week-long program in New Westminster

Recently, the Century House Association and the New Westminster Hospice Society put on an extensive week-long, well-attended program called Dialogue on Death and Dying. It was held mostly at Century House.

Susan Millar – Local Journalism Initiative

It's not a topic that most people want to talk about, but as MaryAnn Becher and Michael Scales of the respective organizations make clear in their discussion with NewWest.tv's journalist Susan Millar, it's a topic that we all need to talk about, no matter what our age.

There are many reasons why: Take for example, how might you want to be remembered? What kind of celebration or memorial would you want? Do you want particular music to be played, writings to be read, things to be said? Similarly, what would those close to you might want? It's a question for every one in your immediate realm, not just the older people. As MaryAnn points out bad things can happen to young people too.

Another difficult issue is grief. How might you grieve? Are there ups and downs to grieving? Where might you get help? How might you help yourself? How might you help others who are grieving? What about grieving children: How do you recognize that they are grieving? How can you help? It's an ongoing process. What not to do: pretend nothing happened – that's how it was often dealt with a generation or so ago.

Most of us don't die suddenly, but most of us spend time in hospital. How do you want to be handled in case of a quick deterioration, such as a heart attack or pneumonia. Do you want to be resusitated or do you prefer heroic action. Do you want to be taken off antibiotics if you get an infection? What about going to a hospice when the end is near:What is it like? Another topic: How do you want your body dispensed with: Are there green options, etc,.

What about preparing for your own death in advance? You'll need a will. You may need an power of attorney. You may need a designated person to make treatment decisions on your behalf. 

While the weeklong program deals with difficult issues, the program offers light fair too, such as dance-walk in Queen's Park, two sessions on music, and an art exhibit. 

But the major thrust of their efforts for the past three years of putting on the program, is to get people talking.